– Y’all I just woke up from a nap, but I don’t remember going to sleep. I had a near nap experience, okay. I just woke up, it’s 7:00. I’ve been sleeping all day, or just for a little bit of time. I don’t know, I don’t
remember going to sleep. I feel like I’ve lost half the day, or a quarter of it, or I
don’t know when I fell asleep. All I remember was I was making sandwiches and here I am. It’s hard to piece together the puzzle when you’re missing 90% of the pieces, or 50%, I don’t know when I went to. I feel real rested though. Now my circadian rhythm’s
all off and junk. Now I’m a night person. I just napped myself into
becoming a night person. I’ve never actually seen the moon. The suns going down. Normally right now I’d
be going down for a nap, but later, earlier, sometime today I did without my own knowledge. It’s kind of like that Bible verse my momma used to read me as a kid. “Now he lay me down to sleep.” Except I didn’t know he
did it against my will. I didn’t see him do it. I didn’t hear him do it. I just woke up from it. I saw the after effects of it like wind. Wind.. did I go to sleep? I know when I woke up,
that’s half the puzzle. When I woke up, I woke
up on top of my bed. I have five pillows on my bed, but I woke up with my head
on a pile of clean underwear. I keep telling myself they’re clean. I’ll be honest, I don’t
remember doing laundry, but I don’t remember taking
a nap so maybe I did. This is as far as I go. I know for a fact I didn’t
eat lunch, or dinner. I don’t think I ate breakfast either. I have no idea when I fell asleep. I mean I’m not mad at it, I feel great. My body went into full
tesla autopilot mode without me knowing. I’m just wondering why
if it got me into bed, why couldn’t it grab a pillow? They weren’t folded like they were clean. Either way I’m gonna
have to wash ’em again, because I drooled myself awake. I dreamt that I was a
part of a great flood. Little did I know I
was the one causing it. Why do I still look tired and hungry? When did I go to sleep? They had to have been dirty. I don’t fold underwear. Another weird thing, it’s
not like there was laundry folded neatly on top of my bed and I just happen to
lay my head down there. No, not only did my body
nap without my permission, but it also accumulated
every piece of underwear I have in the house as a
makeshift pillows situation. Does my house have a gas leak? Did my house eat spicy foods, or McDonald’s french
fries without me knowing? I have a carbon monoxide
detector and I know it works because it keeps beeping at me every three and a half minutes. Either that or the batteries died. This puzzle’s gonna come together whether I force the pieces or not. If I ate right now would
it be breakfast or dinner? Would it matter? I’m hungry. If I had to tell you
about the events of my day it would go as follows, try to keep up. Wake up in the morning and now it’s 7:00. I don’t wanna be a night owl. It’s getting darker by the second. I’ve never had energy at 7:00, am or pm. I’ve been tired, I’ve been
napping without me knowing. I wonder how many times this has happened? I do the opposite of sleep walk. I awake sleep. (laughing) Now I don’t know if what I
dreamt about actually happened or if it was a dream. I’d like to believe I was
on a gondola with Jesus. He was the one who laid me down to sleep at some point today. Is that what a sunset looks like? Jear Desus, I’m wide awake.

Leave a Reply