Gobarnomics & Radar Theory: How Science is being reinvented in #NewIndia | Ep.117 #TheDeshBhakt
New India is a strange place. People win elections and destroy the economy, only to win election again. Institutions, secularism and opposition are few amongst the many subjects which suffered in New India However, there is one subject which is utterly laughable Media is already a joke, we are talking about science. Our politicians hate science. They chase it like Tom chases Jerry. Illogical statements by politicians are a blot on discoveries of Einstein and Aryabhatta In this episode, we have compiled 10 such statements which slaughtered logic. We can do nothing but laugh out loud on these statements. Our politicians are innocent like cows. They have a habit of shitting everywhere. Recently, BJP Bengal chief Dilip Ghosh said that cow’s milk is yellowish because it contains gold. By this logic, my tooth is yellowish too. Should I quit Youtube and start scrubbing them? This guy wanted gold loan for his cow. He should be granted one. Interestingly, there are many yellowish things in our body. We might now get loan for them though. How can we forget Sadhvi Pragya when we are discussing Gobarnomics? She cured her cancer with cow’s urine. “I cured my cancer with cow urine.” Doctors can cure cancer with surgeries but they are not sure if there is a solution for her scientific distemper. In New India, cows give milk, cures cancer and blesses us with gold and diamond “Cow dung is costlier than Kohinoor diamond” If urine has gold and dung has diamond, I suggest Mother Dairy to venture into jewelery business. Not only cow, Peacock also has a supernatural power of reproducing with tear drops. This is a statement given by Rajasthan High Court judge. According to him, Peacock mates when it is emotional. “Peacocks never mate with Peahen. He impregnates her with his tears.” Too many illogical statements. This is called development. Let’s talk about Mythology. Vice City and PUBG games are not exclusive to this generation Biplab Deb says Internet was available at the time of Mahabharata. “Internet satellites existed during Mahabharata” We were deprived of these facts since 70 years. Maybe Lord Krishna’s smartphone ran on Jio network Tomorrow, they will tell us that Ravana abducted Sita in an Uber and blind followers will believe them. Politicians tend to benefit from idiotic statements. Meet Professor Nageswar Rao, the man who made silly statements in Indian Science Congress Ravana had aeroplane and an airport in Lanka? On one side we have ISRO, which is launching missiles to reach Mars and on the other professors like him make silly statements. Who can forget Radar Theory proposed by our Prime Minister? “I thought we can escape Radars if we take advantage of cloud cover” Escaping Radars with clouds is like escaping from wife’s anger with headphones on. A 7th standard science student can tell you that radars have nothing to do with clouds But if you use your ‘Raw wisdom’, clouds can be used to escape radar signals just like Mithun saved himself from bullets hiding behind a bicycle. Piyush Goyal told us that it was Einstein who discovered gravity, not Newton. Piyush Goyal robbed Newton of all his popularity with one statement. However, BJP has a history of crediting people with zero achievements They want to give Bharat Ratna to Savarkar who had zero contributions in freedom movement. Anything is possible if you believe in it. We can achieve $5 trillion economy by 2024. Even if maths is against us. Satyapal Singh does not believe in Darwin’s theory of evolution. “Darwin’s Theory is scientifically wrong. We should not teach it in schools. No one saw an ape turning into a human.” Humans are evolving into donkeys. Going by the same logic, no one ever saw PM selling tea. Should we negate that theory too? The opposite has happened. We have seen humans turning into apes and finally a politician. Vijay Sardesai says that farmers should chant ‘Om rum jum sah’ for good yields. This guy would destroy fertilizer industry with his ideology. Do you have a mantra for stopping farmer suicide? How about ‘Om rum Forgetto Namah?’ If not science, then which subject should children of New India would be studying? It is important we provide heavy education to our children They will study astrology. After all, Astrology is above science. “Science is a midget in front of astrology.” In New India, cows are mothers and donkeys are behaving like fathers Nimbu-mirchi is being used to protect fighter jets. Frogs are married for rainfall and hawans are proposed to combat pollution God and country, both are mutually dependent on each other. Development? That seems absent. We hope you like our new episode. Do give us your feedback in the comments below. Like, share and subscribe to our channel More episodes coming soon!